A Tire Swing Story is a bite-sized "imagining" inspired by an object I discover while wandering. It could be a curbside trash gem or a message sprayed on a wall. A lost mitten, or an antique store find. Anything goes. I photograph the object and post them together, the story and its inspiration. There will be a new story every Monday and Wednesday. On Fridays, I'll discuss writing, life, love, and coffee. (In no particular order and maybe all at once.)

Monday, December 19, 2011

Paul's New Year's Resolutions

1. Quit job. Letter of resignation to be handed in to Mr. Robinson by January 3rd. DO NOT CHICKEN OUT AGAIN!

2. Go to the gym 5 times 3 times a week. 

3. Read things that will help me sound smarter and more appealing at dinner parties. War and Peace. Autobiography of Malcolm X. That Vagina play.

4. Buy new tie. Not from secondhand store. Learn how to tie it without help of roommate's girlfriend.

5. Get a girlfriend. Possibilities include:  

-Sheila, from Human Resources department.
-Brown-haired barista at Beans, Beans, Beans.
 Calvin's sister, Maria, the yoga teacher.
-Nice teller at Royal Bank on Roncesvalles Avenue. Donna? Dara? Denise?

6. Take exotic cooking classes. Thai. East Indian. Sushi. Possibly meet women at cooking class.

7. Eat better. No red meat, except for beef. No more coffee from vending machines at work. Can eat donuts, but no cream filled, or anything bigger than a hockey puck.

8. Make bedroom appealing to women. Throw out E.T. comforter and WWF sheets. Buy lots of pillows and good-smelling candles.

9. Cook dinner for Mom once a week using new Cooking Skills.   

10. Learn Kung Fu.

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